Getting closer to my goal review, am thinking I need to be more serious about my goal working.
Wednesday, January 16, 2013
Tuesday, January 15, 2013
17
What is 17? Keep reading....
Today, it is cold and there was frost to scrape off the windows. Most of the snow has melted, but there are still patches of crunchy crystals in the leeways of buildings and trees.
There are now
days until I can hopefully make these three statements:
Health remarks:
Nutrition: Doing well, plenty of grains, seeds - fiber, healthy protein, need to add more vegetables, that might go into my next set of goals.
Physical Activity: Low to Moderate.
Sleep: After 2:30 a.m. and up at 6:30 to get ready for work (there aren't enough known days of that this tour to complain, though I am tired).
Prayers/Meditation/Affirmation: steady on and positive
Skills/Talents: Business Analyst - created a resume that reflects my experience in this role. I've built many, but I think this one is pretty good. Working well towards handing off tasks to my replacement.
Practice: Doing the right thing when I know it and not beating myself up about it when I don't see it, BUT, hopefully learning a lesson about being more aware and not missing those pesky opportunities for Right Thought and Right Action. Today is the birthday of Hootie and Kazoo, though the celebrations were Saturday, I still have their birthday candles and will light them tonight and make a wish for them.
Dreams: yes, but didn't note them.
Outlook:
I'm tense and have a head ache - probably related, huh? I try not to think about the trip on Friday, but can't help to get excited when I do think about it. I am still disappointed that I will not be spending Sunday in Yellow Stone, but then I feel guilty about being disappointed, after all, I do get to go to the Mountains in Montana to just play in the snow!
Today, I'm a get-by girl.
Peace Out...
BB,
~LM
Today, it is cold and there was frost to scrape off the windows. Most of the snow has melted, but there are still patches of crunchy crystals in the leeways of buildings and trees.
There are now
days until I can hopefully make these three statements:
- I do not drink soda, it is not part of my daily diet, I do not crave it, want it or even think about it.
- My exercise routine includes at least one daily, and one weekly exercise for keeping my heart pumping, stretching, and getting on my feet.
- I have organized at least one room in my home (removing things that haven't been used or looked at, needed or wanted in the last year) and have begun another.
Health remarks:
Nutrition: Doing well, plenty of grains, seeds - fiber, healthy protein, need to add more vegetables, that might go into my next set of goals.
Physical Activity: Low to Moderate.
Sleep: After 2:30 a.m. and up at 6:30 to get ready for work (there aren't enough known days of that this tour to complain, though I am tired).
Prayers/Meditation/Affirmation: steady on and positive
Skills/Talents: Business Analyst - created a resume that reflects my experience in this role. I've built many, but I think this one is pretty good. Working well towards handing off tasks to my replacement.
Practice: Doing the right thing when I know it and not beating myself up about it when I don't see it, BUT, hopefully learning a lesson about being more aware and not missing those pesky opportunities for Right Thought and Right Action. Today is the birthday of Hootie and Kazoo, though the celebrations were Saturday, I still have their birthday candles and will light them tonight and make a wish for them.
Dreams: yes, but didn't note them.
Outlook:
I'm tense and have a head ache - probably related, huh? I try not to think about the trip on Friday, but can't help to get excited when I do think about it. I am still disappointed that I will not be spending Sunday in Yellow Stone, but then I feel guilty about being disappointed, after all, I do get to go to the Mountains in Montana to just play in the snow!
Today, I'm a get-by girl.
Peace Out...
BB,
~LM
Monday, January 14, 2013
Goals along the path of the places I go
I have included three, what I hope are, well not small, but achievable goals that I hope to accomplish by February 1, 2013. They are couched in what I hope to be true statements by that date.
18 days and counting. Starting...wait for it...
...now!
- I do not drink soda, it is not part of my daily habit, I do not crave it, want it or even think about it.
- My exercise routine includes daily, and weekly exercises for keeping my heart pumping, stretching, and getting on my feet.
- I have organized at least one room in my home (removing things that haven't been used or looked at, needed or wanted in the last year) and have begun another.
18 days and counting. Starting...wait for it...
....
....
...now!
18 days until goal review!
Today
Another chance to do the right thing today... to be the right me...
We still have some snow on the ground, the air is not as cold as it was yesterday, I thought I could drive without scraping the windows...wrong! I stopped and for some reason I was stubborn still, so I scraped the minimum needed. Why? I am not sure. It wouldn't have taken that much more time or energy to go all the way around, but as I said I was stubborn about it.
We still have some snow on the ground, the air is not as cold as it was yesterday, I thought I could drive without scraping the windows...wrong! I stopped and for some reason I was stubborn still, so I scraped the minimum needed. Why? I am not sure. It wouldn't have taken that much more time or energy to go all the way around, but as I said I was stubborn about it.
As long as I can get my self to stop and do the right thing, I suppose I will not berate myself for not adding "and a Good Morning, to you," after I've said "Thank you."
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Today is Monday and in a few days (Friday to be exact) I will be....Montana bound!
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Health remarks:
Nutrition: I've done very well today.
Physical Activity: Low to Moderate.
Prayers/Meditation/Affirmation: Good, Positive
Skills/Talents: Business Analyst - Good Work this morning! Also, there are leads and feelers out, some of which are coming back to get more information from me...a good sign...I believe.
Outlook:
1. In my quest for finding my bliss, last night was difficult - bed time is the trap that's been laid for some reason, and I need to get myself out of it. When I go to bed I want to fall asleep not allow the warnings and sirens to begin. I kept them at bay, but with my apnea so bad, each time I awoke, the entire routine needed to be repeated.
2. It's getting a little easier with people in my life, I don't know if they are coming to terms with the way things are or if it is just getting easier to maintain Shalom bayit. It doesn't matter, it is the peace that is important.
3. Sometimes we must put away childhood things...sigh...maybe I'm just being childish.
4. Luggage for Montana trip should arrive today (have the tickets, the baggage check card, itinerary, and msc. Now I need to pack...lightly.
Peace Out...
BB,
~LM
Sunday, January 13, 2013
Entertainment, escape, the things we do for love
"Kiss today, 'Goodbye,' and point me toward tomorrow."
I used to stomp the boards, sing a tune, time step, but I didn't want what would come from the success of it. I didn't want the recognition, expectations, being around false people or people who were always auditioning for you, or trying on new characters. If it was really my dream it wouldn't have let me give it up, I think.
I enjoy movies, theatre, opera, symphony, musicals, and other such staged performances.
I like to read; mostly novels, but other things also.
There are so many emotions in music that some can alter my mood so much, sometimes I try to bottle that, keep tabs for another time when I think that feeling a certain way might be helpful. I try to learn the words.
Sports, some news/journalism
...etc.
Peace Out...
BB,
~LM
I used to stomp the boards, sing a tune, time step, but I didn't want what would come from the success of it. I didn't want the recognition, expectations, being around false people or people who were always auditioning for you, or trying on new characters. If it was really my dream it wouldn't have let me give it up, I think.
I enjoy movies, theatre, opera, symphony, musicals, and other such staged performances.
I like to read; mostly novels, but other things also.
There are so many emotions in music that some can alter my mood so much, sometimes I try to bottle that, keep tabs for another time when I think that feeling a certain way might be helpful. I try to learn the words.
Sports, some news/journalism
...etc.
Peace Out...
BB,
~LM
Saturday, January 12, 2013
Birthday Boots, and other musings
January 15 will be the first anniversary of the birth of two darling grandprincesses, fondly known as Hootie and Kazoo. Their parents had a small party for them today. One of the gifts they were given was a pair of boots...first the silver sequened boots came out and Silv seemed to like those, she reached out for them, held them, moved them around, and gave them her attention for some time. Guin looked at them, but didn't seem too interested. Then, after several minutes, the pink sequened boots came out and Sylv barely gave them a glance, but Guin went after them like gang busters and seemed so excited. When they were put on her she pulled herself up to stand and then (holding on to her Aunt Ea's fingers) she lifted and stomped her be-sequened feet; they seemed to be her dancing boots! So adorable, such a wonderful moment. They each displayed their own unique taste... at such a tender age...they are each their own person.
I collect odd things. 'eclectic' let's say, it sounds nicer...hmm? Sometimes a moment in time, a photograph, a stone or a seed pod catches my eye, a flower petal falls, a piece of wrapping paper, small insignificant things that carry a moment's memory, the energy of an instant - becomes part of my collection. It is not a displayable collection, and it isn't all hidden, but is in varying states of existence. They each remind me of something different .
I collect books, pins, tea pots, not for rarity or investment purposes, but because I enjoy them. I also like dragonflies, (the odd hawk or wolf treasure), damselflies and faeries, too. I don't seek them out (well, other than the books), but are remnants, gifts, things that have caught my eye or otherwise crossed my path.
f g h e f g h e f g h e
It snowed today. The air became cold (very cold), and a wet and beautiful snow - heavily, but not for long. The city turned out with a preemptive strike this morning - treating the streets - well done!
This morning I went to a DAR meeting with my Aunt and it was chilly, buy my wrap was all I needed. This afternoon though it was colder, the wind was more brisk and the snow wet. This evening, leaving the grandprincesses' first birthday party it was downright frigid - to the bone cold.
I didn't sleep well last night - apnea is worse, I stop breathing even when I'm awake.
I dreamed, but it was too real and mundane apparently, because it didn't keep my attention.
Exercise: little to none
Diet: I didn't get any coffee today, with sleep issues and the morning DAR meeting, it just didn't happen. I thought about stopping at a drive-through for a coffee, but the line at the first one was too long, so I went to the meeting. After the meeting I did go to a diner for my egg, raisin toast, bacon, grits, oj, and milk. I had a couple slices of pizza at the girl's party - and that's my intake for the day. Oh and I had a tiny piece of cake (no icing).
Prayers/Mantras/Affirmations: Moda Ani, Today is the Day, Thank you.
Spiritual: Today I add an oak burr that caught my eye after the DAR meeting and two 1st birthday candles (G & S), one pink and one yellow, to my collection of moments and memories of innocence, growth, strength and endurance.
Outward Look: Pretty good...yes, pretty good.
Peace out...
BB,
~LM
I collect odd things. 'eclectic' let's say, it sounds nicer...hmm? Sometimes a moment in time, a photograph, a stone or a seed pod catches my eye, a flower petal falls, a piece of wrapping paper, small insignificant things that carry a moment's memory, the energy of an instant - becomes part of my collection. It is not a displayable collection, and it isn't all hidden, but is in varying states of existence. They each remind me of something different .
I collect books, pins, tea pots, not for rarity or investment purposes, but because I enjoy them. I also like dragonflies, (the odd hawk or wolf treasure), damselflies and faeries, too. I don't seek them out (well, other than the books), but are remnants, gifts, things that have caught my eye or otherwise crossed my path.
f g h e f g h e f g h e
It snowed today. The air became cold (very cold), and a wet and beautiful snow - heavily, but not for long. The city turned out with a preemptive strike this morning - treating the streets - well done!
This morning I went to a DAR meeting with my Aunt and it was chilly, buy my wrap was all I needed. This afternoon though it was colder, the wind was more brisk and the snow wet. This evening, leaving the grandprincesses' first birthday party it was downright frigid - to the bone cold.
f g h e f g h e f g h e
I didn't sleep well last night - apnea is worse, I stop breathing even when I'm awake.
I dreamed, but it was too real and mundane apparently, because it didn't keep my attention.
Exercise: little to none
Diet: I didn't get any coffee today, with sleep issues and the morning DAR meeting, it just didn't happen. I thought about stopping at a drive-through for a coffee, but the line at the first one was too long, so I went to the meeting. After the meeting I did go to a diner for my egg, raisin toast, bacon, grits, oj, and milk. I had a couple slices of pizza at the girl's party - and that's my intake for the day. Oh and I had a tiny piece of cake (no icing).
Prayers/Mantras/Affirmations: Moda Ani, Today is the Day, Thank you.
Spiritual: Today I add an oak burr that caught my eye after the DAR meeting and two 1st birthday candles (G & S), one pink and one yellow, to my collection of moments and memories of innocence, growth, strength and endurance.
Outward Look: Pretty good...yes, pretty good.
Peace out...
BB,
~LM
Friday, January 11, 2013
Dreams
I dream when I sleep.
I've had some surreal abstract bizarre dreams, some startling, but also some real I sometimes think that is the reality and this the state of unconsciousness.
1/11/2013
This morning I awoke and remembered dreaming that I'd gotten a job that I'd applied for. I don't remember why my husband was there at the office (getting ready to leave) looking dashing and wearing a white with thin lined hash patterned. I'd say plaid but then I'd think tartan, or checked, but then I'd think multi-colored. The threads reading the hash marks were probably deep red and blue, but the squares they made were about 3/4" white. I don't know why I am spending so much time describing it other than it caught my attention to this length.
The husband in my dream was a man I've never met or seen, as far as I can think. I remember a feeling - not of gushing love, but fondness, contentment, and maybe even a bit proud. Also, when asked his age I gave the age of G... who died.
The job was not a high paying one, but it was better than not being employed, it was in the department next to the one I currently work in - at much higher pay, but as a temporary employee - still I'm doing my thing here, there I would not be, it would be "work" vs. "career." Again...it's a job as an actual employee.
The Director of the department that oversees this department in real life (...sigh...) was the head of this department in my dream and he was kind (as he is) and showed me around and told me about various things in the department and seemed interested in other things in my life (as a human being, where some employers act as though any life outside of the workplace is secondary and unimportant).
What I've forgotten, is what happened just before this....it was why my husband was there....it was why I needed to take with me something(s)....
There were a couple other people in the office when I first was told about it and came over to my new "chair" which was ....?...at a counter? ...with a window separating the office from the 'customer'? ...don't know why because this job is back office contacts by phone/email sort of thing. Anyway the other people (women) were familiar, but not necessarily from work.
It was satisfaction, I think. A beginning.
The 0 - Fool card.
Am I coming out from a dark unaware unenlightened ignorance, ready to accept an opportunity even if it is not a challenging or rewarding one? Am I about to take my first steps again, into a new life? Is this the precursor to a rebirth or is this a rebirth?
....hmmm...I think if it were the first steps, then it is a bit of a let down...settling for something because it is needed? Wouldn't it be more fulfilling, more meaningful if it was an opportunity? An opportunity implies the possibility of more, better, challenging things to come, doesn't it? It does to me I think. Whereas, settling implies (to me) stepping down or to the side and accepting that, making a commitment to accept that.
Perhaps the precursor, for some reason the 0 card came to mind - why? - maybe it augers something that is coming soon - a rebirth, of sorts, a new beginning, a do-over...?
Peace Out...
BB,
~LM
I've had some surreal abstract bizarre dreams, some startling, but also some real I sometimes think that is the reality and this the state of unconsciousness.
1/11/2013
This morning I awoke and remembered dreaming that I'd gotten a job that I'd applied for. I don't remember why my husband was there at the office (getting ready to leave) looking dashing and wearing a white with thin lined hash patterned. I'd say plaid but then I'd think tartan, or checked, but then I'd think multi-colored. The threads reading the hash marks were probably deep red and blue, but the squares they made were about 3/4" white. I don't know why I am spending so much time describing it other than it caught my attention to this length.
The husband in my dream was a man I've never met or seen, as far as I can think. I remember a feeling - not of gushing love, but fondness, contentment, and maybe even a bit proud. Also, when asked his age I gave the age of G... who died.
The job was not a high paying one, but it was better than not being employed, it was in the department next to the one I currently work in - at much higher pay, but as a temporary employee - still I'm doing my thing here, there I would not be, it would be "work" vs. "career." Again...it's a job as an actual employee.
The Director of the department that oversees this department in real life (...sigh...) was the head of this department in my dream and he was kind (as he is) and showed me around and told me about various things in the department and seemed interested in other things in my life (as a human being, where some employers act as though any life outside of the workplace is secondary and unimportant).
What I've forgotten, is what happened just before this....it was why my husband was there....it was why I needed to take with me something(s)....
There were a couple other people in the office when I first was told about it and came over to my new "chair" which was ....?...at a counter? ...with a window separating the office from the 'customer'? ...don't know why because this job is back office contacts by phone/email sort of thing. Anyway the other people (women) were familiar, but not necessarily from work.
It was satisfaction, I think. A beginning.
The 0 - Fool card.
Am I coming out from a dark unaware unenlightened ignorance, ready to accept an opportunity even if it is not a challenging or rewarding one? Am I about to take my first steps again, into a new life? Is this the precursor to a rebirth or is this a rebirth?
....hmmm...I think if it were the first steps, then it is a bit of a let down...settling for something because it is needed? Wouldn't it be more fulfilling, more meaningful if it was an opportunity? An opportunity implies the possibility of more, better, challenging things to come, doesn't it? It does to me I think. Whereas, settling implies (to me) stepping down or to the side and accepting that, making a commitment to accept that.
Perhaps the precursor, for some reason the 0 card came to mind - why? - maybe it augers something that is coming soon - a rebirth, of sorts, a new beginning, a do-over...?
Peace Out...
BB,
~LM
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